Reading Guide

This reading guide is especially helpful for groups of people reading, Date Yourself, together, but can be used alone. The book is laid out to propose a 30-day process. In all reality this work is much deeper and can take as much time as you're willing to devote to it.

The recommendation of the author is to read the book through and then plan 30-days where this is your primary focus, returning to various activities and exercises one at a time, as not to rush and get the most benefit from each. 

In addition to this reading guide, also remember that the book has an accompanying journal.  The journal highlights a few exercises and gives you space and more tools to dig deep. You can download and print out a copy the journal from the link included in the book. If you prefer, you can order a physical copy from Amazon: click here.

With friends or in a book club consider the following questions: 

Pre Reading Questions: 

1. Why did you pick up this book? What are you tempted by and what are you hoping this book will accomplish for you?
   1. What are your assumptions and preconceived notions about what it means to date yourself, to have a relationship with yourself, to be a priority in your life? What do you have to give up in order to be able to date yourself?
2. Knowing yourself as you do, what is your best process for taking on personal exploration and personal transformation? Do you have a system that you prefer or are you open to adopt any recommendations?

Introduction and chapter 1

What is your primary reaction to the information presented so far?  What are your main takeaways?

Chapter 2: Breaking Up

Of the exercises presented here which ones feel doable and which ones feel really challenging?  Be honest. Which ones have you done? Which ones are you likely to get too soon? And which ones will you avoid forever?  

Chapter 3: Becoming your Ideal Partner

What comes up for you in this process of reframing yourself as your ideal partner,  as our primary person?

Chapter 4 & 5: Flirting to Dating & Identities and the Stories we Tell  

Of the ideas and activities presented in these chapters which ones really excite you? Which one's freak you out a little bit? Which ones feel juicy and rich?

Chapter 6 and 7: Communication & Love

These chapters are grouped together in this reading guide. How do you see the relationship between communication and love and your on life, in your ideal and in your past experience? 

Chapters 8 and 9: You've got Body & Dating your Cycle

How comfortable do you feel in your own body, in this womanly form? How comfortable you feel with your cyclical nature? 

Chapter 10: Putting it all Together 

The practices suggested here are framed in a 30-day context. By now you see and understand that this is a life's work. 

What is your first next right step towards this loving relationship with yourself?

Chapter 11: Dating Yourself in a Relationship

Think back to past relationships or, if you are in one now, your current relationship. How easy is it to maintain your identity and honor your boundaries, care for yourself in the context of a relationship?  Discuss and share why that is. What tools from this chapter will you play with and implement soon?

Soul contract & Postscript

Too many stories and live happily ever after these final two chapters serve to temper those expectations but even more for you to build a fundamentally new practice for yourself. 

What stuck out for you?